When I was a young girl, about the age of 7, my parents split up.
I didn't realize it then, but I see it so clearly now, that I didn't have much of a chance of avoiding the trauma that this would cause to impact my life for many years to come.
When I was 18, my Mother institutionalized me in a psychiatric ward, because she didn't understand that I was having a spiritual awakening.
I didn't see it at the time, but the trauma of this experience would shut off my spiritual gifts for many years to come.
When I was 25, I lost my mind for about 2-3 months. I literally woke up one day thinking I'd woken up out of a thousand year sleep, I was an immortal, and my whole life had been a dream. The next few months were terrifying for those around me, and for myself, as I looked back on the experience after I gained back who I was.
This affected me and my life choices for much longer than I care to admit, as I based an entire part of my career off of working in service as a healer, due to the fact that I was afraid that I would lose my mind again, if I didn't.
My heart wants you to know this story so that you can see where I've come from.
I know that we all have intense, traumatic experiences that shape us. Experiences that make us who we are. Underneath all of this conditioning, there is someone else awaiting us.
I have spent the past 2.5 years trying to get a better sense of who I am without all of the programming, all of the trauma, and all of the conditioning society, and those around me, have projected onto me.
It's been tough.
It's made me cry a lot.
It's made me feel a lot of pain and discomfort.
It's made me see that I didn't know who I was, because I was living as a being running many different programs, who was not connected to her own truth.
The next chapter is starting now.
The chapter in which I get to decide with each choice, with each action, with each thought, with each small step I take, and with each understanding I have, how I can live my life from a place of real, true, authenticity.
Sending Love To You,
Alexandra